Order of haruhi
by Silencemybrother
Summary: Haruhi gets an invitation from a American high school club closely linked to an old secret Christian order. Who's haruhi to resist? Major OC warning ABANDONED
1. Chapter 1

The order of Haruhi

I do not take credit for the characters, or the basic plot; that is to go to the user known as redeemer9855.

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"We're going to America" haruhi bluntly stated.

So yah just a normal day for me, right? Oh wait I hang out with aliens, espers, a time traveler, and, for all the universe could care, a god; add to the god part sociopathic, arrogant, sadistic, and a teenage girl you would have the definition of haruhi.

Unluckily for me I have to survive the punishment of being around her, luckily miss asahina is there to at least provide some comfort.

Haruhi gets her "brigade", at least that's what she calls it of course in reality it's just a school club, of all the stupid, asinine things she does, I never thought she would say that, I mean only nagato and maybe koizumi know english, and I sure as hell don't know anything even though its mandatory here in Japan. I guess you would like me to shut up now and let you here the rest of the conversation? Oh right I'm just thinking to myself again.

"Haruhi you do realize this is a stupid idea, do you even know english? And how are you going to get the money for a plane flight and the money for us all apartments?" I asked annoyed as usual by haruhi.

"Silly, we will share two apartments, one for the boys and the other one one for us girls" she said with excitement.

Ok you only answered one of my questions and I bet your going to get the best apartment for you anyway.

"We'll of course! I'm the brigade leader, and your leader deserves the best shelter available!" She said arrogantly.

I stopped fighting then, I saw no use continuing, she probably doesn't have the money anyway.

"Sounds wonderful, how do you plan to get there?" Kouzmi asked with his trade mark smile.

Of course you of all people would be fine, I bet if haruhi decided she wanted to be like hitler and commit genocide you would say "how many and how long?"

"That's the beauty of it, some group payed for it" haruhi said.

As soon as I heard this I looked straight at kozumi, he just shrugged. I guess this is a different organization.

"Alright but haruhi what if our parents, or the school for that matter say no?" I asked knowing she couldn't come up with any argument.

I was wrong.

Haruhi then got her mischievous smile on and said in a smug voice "they won't refuse once they learn how important it is"

I face palmed. I know that the school is practically run by the esper boys, but really she's going to manipulate... Well this is haruhi.

"What is this group called?" Kozumi asked.

"The Christian brotherhood, something like that." Haruhi waved off dismissively "the important thing is I heard some rumors they are connected to some secret society, that's what I'm after... I mean what the SOS brigades after"

I sighed, really haruhi you can stop pretending that the stuff the brigade does is stuff the brigade... Wait did she say the Christian brotherhood? Espers already treat her like god, I can't imagine what a Christian organization is like to her.

I noticed kozumi's face had slightly changed soon hearing those words, perhaps he knows someone from there, or the two groups are at war or whatever I just really want this meeting over.

"And if any of you refuse to come you will get the ultimate deadliest penalty" she said with a harsh voice.

Sure haruhi we all get it if we don't go you will throw a tantrum like a 3 year old and mentally traumatize us.

"Now if there are no questions I'm leaving to pack" she said as she walked out and closed the door.

I guess she didn't expect any questions.

"Kozumi, what is this "Christian brotherhood" all about?" I asked curiously.

"Well, we don't know much, we only have one agent named Madysen Adaire in their service but from what we know its a recruiter for the order of the christian god; practically the Christian version of us espers, except instead of closed spaces they have haunted zones. Basically like us us except they fight demons"kozumi explained.

"So they know about haruhi?" I asked.

"Apparently so, otherwise they wouldn't have bothered with tickets" kozumi replied

"So is this bad?" I asked.

Kozumi shook his head "I'm not for sure if it is or not."

I looked to nagato "anything?"

"The data integration entity has not found anything out of the ordinary about them" nagato said.

Wait so we are basically going on a blind date here?

"Exactly" kozumi replied

Well this will turn out good.


	2. Chapter 2

Order of haruhi chapter 2

You know I sometimes wonder what goes on in the head if haruhi, but then I remember its haruhi, and I probably would not be sane if I actualy saw it.

Why am I saying this you ask? Well, haruhi just so happened to come to my house today, long story short: she said that we had been assigned to the exchange student program.

The sad thing is my parents didn't notice ANYTHING suspicious about what she said, and as such, didnt ask any questions. So as a consequence I'm here getting lectured from haruhi for being too slow.

"Hurry up damnit!", Haruhi shouted in my ear "could you be any slower!"

"Oh yes I could be slower, how slow do you want me to be?", I asked sacasticaly

"Stop being a smartass kyon!", Haruhi said after giving me a rather painful slap.

I, in a way, was looking forward to going to America for two reasons. One I hear its a lot easier, two I heard most school don't have uniforms.

Sadly haruhi told me it was a private school, and that everyone had to wear uniforms. I'm guessing sense it's private it will be harder too, but honestly what did I expect from haruhi. I mean I know she wouldn't settle for any normal school.

"Well even at your pace you finally got your packing done" haruhi stated with annoyance.

"Ugh... Haruhi you do realize that you were yelling into my ear the entire time" I said to a angry haruhi

"How else would I get your lazy ass to work? I'll be back tomorrow and you better be awake and ready!" She yelled at me.

"Haruhi just get out if all your going to do is yell at me and keep me up all night" I said to her.

"I was going to be going anyway", she smugly stated.

God she's annoying.

The order

"Damnit kyon I told you to be awake and ready", haruhi said to me.

"Just five more minutes..." I half consciously said.

I was then made fully awake by a fury of fists.

"Ow ow ow... Stop it haruhi!" I said with anger in my voice.

"Don't take that tone with your brigade leader! Now get up!"

After she practical ripped me out of bed and forced me to get ready to go, I was dragged out into the streets without being able to say goodbye to my family.

Once we arrived at the airport we waited on the rest to arrive. What annoys me is she came to my house to wake me up, but not kozumi or nagato; well nagato is a special case but haruhi doesn't know that. Maybe what kozumi said about me is true, maybe in some strange way she actually cares about me more than the rest?

Who am I kidding? She sees us all as pawns in her game of life. Damn... I think I'm starting to sound like kozumi... That bastards always going on and on about something.

Eh, speaking of kozumi...

"Sorry we'er late, I had to convince my parents that I was telling the truth" he apologized.

Oh I'm sure it's that, you probably just had a esper boy meeting.

"Your forgiven, now kyon!" She yelled at me.

"Yes master" I said annoyed.

"Stop acting like an ass and take our luggage" she barked.

"Why not give it as a penalty to kozumi?" I asked rhetorically.

"He has, unlike you, been respectful to his brigade leader, now take our luggage until we get on the plane" she said smugly.

We'll that's because kozumi's a selfish sissy boy that doesn't want you to get mad, so you don't make him do his job.

"Now come on let's go!" Haruhi said as she walked to get to our flight.


	3. Chapter 3

Order of Haruhi chapter 3

Well after an annoyingly long plane ride we have arrived at our destination; Vatican City, Pennsylvania. Funny it shares its name with the one at Italy with the pope and everything, and we were sent here by a Christian brother hood: kinda ironic if you think about it.

Anyways let me get out of my mind and back into the world.

"Kyon! Are you listening to me?" A angry Haruhi asked.

Figures she would ask me that.

"What is it?" I replied.

"Damnit Kyon! Could you try to pay attention for at least a minuet?" A stuck up Haruhi asked.

"Just tell me already would you?" I said to an obviously annoyed Haruhi.

"I was saying we have to get to the school to meet the club, they paid for us to come here you know" Haruhi said.

"Perhaps we should rest at the apartment before we go" Nagato said in her monotone voice.

That's an unusual thing for Nagato to say. I hope nothing bad has happened... Or she senses something bad is about to happen.

"Nagato! We have to get to the club, even if Kyon has to carry all our luggage" haruhi said with excitement.

Wait! No I'm not your lackey, I'm a humman being and... Oh never mind she doesn't care.

"What was that Kyon?" Haruhi asked suspiciously. Damn I'm going to have to learn to keep my thoughts from slipping out

"I think it would be best if we took a bit of a rest" Kozumi stated.

Ok something's wrong if Kozumi's disagreeing with Haruhi, something definitely is up.

"Um... I think that would be a good idea too... Please don't hurt me" miss Asahina said with a nervous look on her face.

"What's with you all? I'm your brigade leader and I say Kyon will be my pack mule and we are going to the schools club room! And that is finial!" Haruhi said blowing off steam "kozumi, although I hate to do this, you must be punished. Kyon doesn't know any better, but... But you are always loyal so help Kyon carry the luggage."

"Yes, miss Suzimya" Kozumi said as he took luggage off me.

At least she didn't punish me this time.

The Order

"Yay! We finial get to meet the Christian Brotherhood!" Haruhi said joyfully as she opened the door to the school, which I might add, had an odd feeling to it.

Walking down the hallways was pretty disorienting, considering I didn't know what room in hell this club was at, and all the directions are in English. After so long I actual notice Haruhi didn't really know english after all by the way she didn't look at any directions, of course this could just be her arrogant pride; likely it's a combination of both.

"Hello, are you the new exchange students?" A male student said. This student in particular had dark blue eyes, dark ceaser style hair, and a stance and attitude that reminded me so much of of Haruhi.

"Yes, why do you ask?" A stuck up Haruhi asked the man.

"I'm the guy that got you here, I'm Jack Corvo" this "jack" said with a similar attitude to Haruhi "I'm guessing your Haruhi, leader of the SOS Brigade."

"Yep, this is Nagato, Kozumi, Asahina, and my favorite pack mule; Kyon" Haruhi said pointing to each of us as she said our names.

Why can't she treat me like a human being. Why can't she just be a little nicer.

"Hey, how do you understand us?" I asked.

"All members of this club have at least a basic day-to-day vocabulary of English, Spanish, and Japanese" Jack explained. "I my self also know Hebrew."

"How interesting" a curious Kozumi said. "I'm guessing your in to understanding the original meaning of the Old Testament?" Kozumi asked.

"Hmm... Part of the reason, would you like to come into the club room?" Jack asked.

"Sure!" An excited Haruhi replied.

"We'll then let's get going" he said as he opened the door.

The club room wasn't as big as I thought it was, in fact it wasn't much bigger than our club room. As usual there were some crosses and I think a small picture if Mary, but I'm not for sure. There was only one person in the room. This person had long dark brown hair in a ponytail style with hazel-colored eyes, and was currently reading a book.

"Ah so your guests have arrived" the man said.

"Yes Michael, may I introduce to you Haruhi Suzimya" Jack said.

"Is this all of your members?" I asked, seeing how empty the clubroom is.

"No, most of the members are at home, American students usual don't stay this late at school" Michael explained.

"We'll it was a pleasure meeting all of you, and thanks for the free flight, but I think me and my members better leave" Haruhi said.

So now you say you want to go, how interesting you couldn't had said that before my back practically broke.

"Good to meet you too, I hope you enjoy your stay in America" jack said with a smile.

Sure buddy, whatever.


End file.
